My take on the five drinks that calm you down:

1. Guinness Extra Stout. Beats a glass of milk any time for taking the edge off of a stressful day.

2. Miller High Life. So much easier than a mug of hot cocoa, unless your mommy is at hand to make it for you.

3. Decaf coffee, with a splash of Bailey’s Irish Cream in the bottom. I like tea, too, but come on, a cup of black tea in the afternoon will have me wide-eyed for hours after my bedtime. I need my nine hours of shut-eye.

4. Sparkling wine. Freixenet is good, and inexpensive. Nothing is more relaxing than celebrating a birthday, or the end of the week, with someone you love. Do make sure that you split the bottle with one or two other people. Morning after headaches are not calming in the least.

5. Lemon Zinger tea. The best tea ever. I went to a fancy tea shop with a friend and, neandertal that I am, nothing measured up to my favorite Celestial Seasonings herbal teas. Do not add alcohol. No, really, you lush, put down the bottle.